Список текстов песен tenacious d

Текст песни:

This is a song
for the ladies
but fellas... listen closely

You don′t have to fuck her hard
in fact sometimes that′s not right to do..
Sometimes u got to make some love
and fuckin give her some smooches too..
Sometimes you got to squeeze..
Sometiems you got to say "Please"..
Sometimes you gotta say "Hey,"
"I′m gonna fuck you.. softly"
"I′m gonna screw you gently"
"I′m gonna hump you sweetly"
"I′m gonna ball you discreetly"
and then you say "Hey, I brought you flowers"
and then you say "Wait a minute Sally,"
"I think I got sometin′ in my teeth could you get it out for me?"
That′s fuckin′ teamwork!
What′s your favorite posish?
That′s cool with me, It′s not my favorite but I′ll do it for you.
What′s your favorite dish?
I′m not gonna cook it but I′ll order it from ZANZIBAR!
And then I′m gonna love you completely
Then I′ll fucking fuck you discreetly
and then I′ll fuckin bone you completely
but then I′m gonna fuck... you hard.....
Hard........

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

The government totally sucks
You motherfucker
The government totally sucks

Ben franklyn was a rebel indeed
He liked to get naked while he smoked on the weed
He was a genious but if he was here today
The government would fuck him up his righteous aayyy

Now let me tell you something about the government (uh huh)
They′re fucking up the environment (say what?)
They′re taking all the fucking beautiful animals (yeah?)
And making them fucking extinct (oh no!)
The government totally sucks
You motherfucker
The government totally sucks
The government totally sucks

Cos the land of love and freedom,
Is just a days breath away
And if we hold hands together
We can bring back the USA

The USAAAAAA YEAAHHH
Bring back the USAAAA YEAAHH
The fucking USAAAA YEAHHHH
Bring back the US

Government totally sucks!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
more precious than a diamond on a platinum chain!

In Venice Beach, there was a man named Kage
When he was buskin′ he was all the rage.
He met Jables and he taught him well,
all the techniques that were developed in hell.
Cock pushups and the power slide,
geek simulation now there′s nowhere to hide.
They formed a band they named Tenacious D,
and then they got the Pick of Destiny.

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
our tasty grooves are better than a chicken chow mein!

Cause he who is sleazy,
is easy to pleasy.
And she who is juicy,
must be loosy-goosey.
And he who is groovy,
will be in my movie,
so come on!

The wizard and the demon had a battle royale,
the demon almost killed him with an evil kapow,
but then he broke his tooth and thus the deamon said oww.

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know our movie′s better than the Citizen Kane!

Cause he who′s a geezer,
must live in my freezer.
And she who is stockey,
is full of mularkey.
And he who is groovy,
must be in my movie,
so come on!

Oh! Cause if you′re a diva,
then go to Geneva.
And if you′re a carny,
then suck on my bony.
And if you are groovy,
then get in my movie!

It′s called the Pick of Destiny!
The Pick of Destiny

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

KG:
We should talk about the hard fucking, though...

JB:
Hard fucking?

KG:
Because, I think it′s a pretty common complaint

JB:
Yeah, the ladies don′t really like the hard fucking

KG:
You feel like you′re giving them some extra juice

JB:
They′re not into that!

KG:
No... You think you′re like, oh, taking them to the limit

JB:
Maybe they are, though... they′re into that... You know what the test is?
You just say, "Get on top, honey! You do what you like!" And then
sometimes she′ll be fucking you really hard... It′s like, "Wait! You like that?
You like that? Slow down, I′m gonna spurt... Ah! Ah! Sorry... shouldn′t
have fucked me so hard!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

This is a song called the history of tenacious D
and its not just a list of things we′ve done in the past
but its a chronicling of our rise to POWER!

We ride with kings on mighty steeds across the devils plain
we′ve walked with jesus and his cross he did not die in vain no!
We run with wolves we′ve climbed K2 even stopped a moving train
We′ve traveled through space and time my friend to rock this house again
ROCK!

Kyle′s fingers be silver, Jacks voice then be gold
But lest you think were vain
We know its the showcase and we dont care!
Tenacious D..WE REING!
We reign supreme!
oh GOD!!!!!!!!! Burrito Supreme, and a chicken supreme, and a cutless
supreme!
Supreme Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!
*Scream* Go now kyle go now kyle!
SUPREME!!!!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

I can′t get to sleep tonight
No matter how hard I try
Cause it′s cold and it′s dark
And the wind is a whistlin′
And I can′t seem to put out the light
Momma′s been searching for baby
But baby been tryin′ to get home
Cause it′s cold and it′s dark
And the moon cannot light the way
And Daddy′s gone - (bye bye)

I′m just a babyyyyy

(crying)

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

I wasn′t very popular in high school, And here′s what I figured out
It was because I needed it too much, I needed attention
I think I have a, a chromosome, The need-attention-chromosome
I know that some of you have it too
And its fuckin′ tragic
Caused a lot of pain, early on
And this is a song about that

Everything sucked in high school
So I moved to the Miiiidlle Eeeast
I kicked ass with the Krishna
I took on their belief

Sista! A-Hari Krishna
A-Hari Hari, A-Fucking Hari

Now I′m back home now
Momma don′t like me
Daddy don′t recognize me
A Hari Hari

A-Hari Krishna, oh yeah!
A Fucking Hari
A Hariiiiiiiii

A nigga greeeesss

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know I will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
my presense is a diamond on a platinum chain!

In Venice Beach, there was a man named Kage
When he was buskin′ he was on the rage.
He met Jables and he taught him well,
all the techniques that were developed in hell.
Cock pushups and the power slide,
geek simulation now there′s nowhere to hide.
They formed a band they named Tenacious D,
and then they got the Pick of Destiny.

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know I will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
our tasty grooves are better than a chicken chow ming!

Cause he who is sleazy,
is easy to pleasy.
And she who is juicy,
must be loosy-goosey.
And he who is groovy,
will be in my movie,
so come on!

Well even when the demons had a battle royale,
the demon almost killed him with an evil kapow,
but then he broke his tooth and thus the demon said "OW!".

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know I will be rockin′ cause it′s fucking insane!

Cause it′s the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know our movie′s better than the Citizen Kane!

Cause he who′s a geezer,
must live in my freezer.
And she who is stockey,
is full of mularkey.
And he who is groovy,
must be in my movie,
so come on!

Oh! Cause if you′re a diva,
then go to Geneva.
And if you′re a carny,
then suck on my bony.
And if you are groovy,
then get in my movie!

It′s called the Pick of Destiny!
The Pick of Destiny.

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

This is a song called the history of tenacious d
and its not just of list of things that we′ve done in the past,
but its a chronicling of our rise to POWER!
we ride with kings on mighty steeds across the devil′s plain
we′ve walked with Jesus and his cross
he did not die in vain No!

we′ ve run with wolves
we′ve climbed K2 even stopped a moving train
we′ve travelled through space and time my friends to rock this house again Rock!

Kyle′s fingers be silver
BoTH
Jack′s voice then be gold
both lest you think we′re vain!

We know its the showcase and we don′t care
Tenacious D we reign....
we reign Supreme
OH GOD!!!!!!!!!!Burrito supreme, and a chicken supreme and a Cutless Supreme
Supreme Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!
[scream]Go now Kyle Go now Kyle
SUpreme!!!!!!!!!!
we reign SUpreme

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

(Kyle Gass snores loudly)

Jack Black: Oh my god. Oh my god, I′ve done it.
(shouts) Cage! Come here, I want you!
Kyle: What? What?? God! I′m sleeping, dude!
What are you talking about...
Jack: Oh my god.
Kyle: What?
Jack: I did it.
Kyle: What d′ya do?
Jack: I′ve done it. I fuckin′ did it.
The most powerful tool in singing technology since yodelling, dude.
Oh my god, inward singing.
Kyle: What?
Jack: Check it out, it′s an invention.
And it makes non-stop rocking possible.
(shouts) Think about it, man!
Rock singers are only rocking you half of the time!
The other time they′re...they′re...they′re...they′re breathing! In!
But not anymore, baby! hahahahaha!! Not with inward singing, check it out!
(Jack sings inwards, then outwards. while doing this, he sings:)
And then I start some lyrics and you can′t believe I′m singing
And I′m never fucking stopping
And I′m always fucking singing
And now you know that I will never stop the fucking singing
I′m like a fucking one-man band
I′m like a fucking one-man band!
(Jack then starts talking again)
And I can sing like that all fucking night!
Kyle: ...Wow....It wasn′t really non-stop though, there was a slight...
Jack: (shouts) Arrgh, shut up! It is non-stop!
And the other thing is, that when I′m fuckin′ singing in,
it sounds even better!
Than when I′m singing out! Shut up! Fuck you! You fucking dick!
Always nay-saying...everything I create! You piece of shit!
YOU create something like inward singing! You fucking shit!
You fucking sit in your tower! Fucking nap...
Kyle: (laughing)
Jack: What′s funny??.... You fucking bitch! Fucking...fuck you!
Fuckin′...cock ass!!
(Jack pauses for a minute to breathe)
Jack: You′re fired from the band.
Kyle: Um, that won′t be necessary, Jack.
Jack: Why?
Kyle: I′m quitting.
Jack: What?
Kyle: I quit.

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

You can′t kill the metal
The metal will live on
Punk-Rock tried to kill the metal
But they failed, as they were smite to the ground
New-wave tried to kill the metal
But they failed, as they were stricken down to the ground
Grunge tried to kill the metal Ha,hahahahaha
They failed, as they were thrown to the ground
Aargh! yeah! [x2]

[Singing]

No-one can destroy the metal
The metal will strike you down with a vicious blow
We are the vanquished foes of the metal
We tried to win for why we do not know

New-wave tried to destroy the metal, but the metal had its way
Grunge then tried to dethrone the metal, but metal was in the way
Punk-rock tried to destroy the metal, but metal was much too strong
Techno tried to defile the metal, but techno was proven wrong
Yea!

Metal!
It comes from hell!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

The road is fuckin′ hard,
The road is fuckin′ tough-ah,
There′s no question that-eh
It is rough, rough stuff.
It′s the fuckin′ road my friend
But it′s the only road I know.
When I′m munchin′ on a tasty boosh
Right after the show.
You g-go go go!

The road is fuckin′ hard,
It′s also really fuckin′ tough,
There′s no question that
It don′t take no guff.
The road is a be-a-itch my friend
But it′s the only fuckin′ road I know,
When I′m snackin′ on a tasty boosh
Right after the show.
You g-go go go!

I met a tasty baby in Michigan.
We screwed two times then I left.
Sometimes I think of my baby in Michigan.
Why can′t I stay in one place
For more than two days.
Why?!
Because I′m talkin′ about the road. [5X]
Road!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

i want you to want me
i need you to need me
i′d love you to love me
i′m beggin′ you to beg me

i′ll shine up my old brown shoes
put on a brand new shirt
get home early from work
if you saaaaay
that you love me

didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′
ohh didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′
feelin all alone without a friend you know you feel like dyin′
ohh didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′

i want you to want me
i need you to need me
i′d love you to love me
i′m beggin′ you to beg me

i′ll shine up my old brown shoes
put on a brand new shirt
get home early from work
if you saaaaay
that you love me

didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′
ohh didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′
feelin all alone without a friend you know you feel like dyin′
ohh didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′

heyyy!!!!

*guitar solo*

feelin all alone without a friend you know you feel like dyin′
didn′ i didn′ i didn′ i see you cryin′

*guitar solo*

i want you to want me
i need you to need me
i′d love you to love me
i′m beggin′ you to beg me

i want you to want me
i want you to want me
i want you to want me
i want you to want me

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

Ho Ho Ho
So many christmas letters,
So many wishes,
Lucy wants a squeezie doll,
Jimmy wants a moon rocket,
Oh, this list is rather long,

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!

Hey now Santa I′m writing to you,
Cos there′s alot of cool shit I want
I know I′ve been naughty but cut me some slack,
Cos there′s alot of cool shit I want,
So here′s my list-a,
So check it out twice-a,
I waaaaaaant,
A solid gold Harley with machine guns on the front,
I waaaaaaant,
A Motley Crew lunchbox filled with sticky buns,

I want a see through jumpsuit that fits me tight,
I want all of the Beatles copyrights,
I want to chop Florida off the map,
I want Pamela Andersons speedo top,

So there you go Santa theres my christmas list,
Thats all the cool shit I want,
But wait a minute Santa theres some things I missed,
There′s still alot of cool shit I want,
So here′s my list-a,
So check it out twice-a,
I waaaaaaant,
A time machine and a BB gun,
I waaaaaaant,
A statue of Moby on the surface of the sun,
I waaaaaaant,
To party naked on a schoolbus full of nuns,
I waaaaaaant,
A bumper pool table and a robot pelican,

There you go Santa I′m sure you′ll agree,
That there′s some really cool shit I want,
I know I′ve been naughty but I guarantee,
That I deserve every single one,

So here′s my list-a,
So check it out twice-a,
I know I′ve been naughty but life aint nice-a,
PS I still-a need some more shit-a,

I waaaaaaant,
A diamond hyena shooting fire from his butt,
I waaaaaaant,
A cannibal chef to cook me sweet and sour buns,
I waaaaaaant,
A magical sleigh thats pulled by flying skunks,
I waaaaaaant,
All the cool shit I want!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

[Beelz] I am complete!

[Both] Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!

[Beelz] yes you are fucked, shit out of luck
now I′m complete and my cock you will suck
This world will be mine and you′re first in line
you brought me the pick and now you shall both die!

[JB] Wait! Wait! Wait!
you motherfucker
we challenge you to a rock off!
give us one chance to rock your socks off

[Beelz] Fuck, fuck, fuck
the demon code prevents me
from declining a rock off challenge
what are your terms? what is the catch?

[JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell.
and also you will have to pay our rent

[Beelz] And what if *i* win?
[JB] then you can take Kage back to hell...
[KG] What?
[JB] trust me Kage, its the only way,
[KG] What the fuck are you talking about?
[JB] to be your little bitch.
[Beelz]
Fine! Let the rock off begin!hahahahaa
I′m the devil i love metal!
Check this riff it′s fucking tasty
I′m the devil i can do what i want,
whatever i got I′m gonna flaunt,
there′s never been a rock off that I′ve ever lost
i cant wait to take Kage back to hell
I′m gonna fill him with my hot demon gel
I′ll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel

[JB] Noooooo!
c′mon Kage bring the thunder
[KG] there′s just no way that we can win,
that was a masterpiece.
[JB] listen to me
[KG] he rocks too hard because he′s not a mortal man
[JB] goddamn-it Kage,
he gonna make you his sex slave,
you′re gonna gargle mayonnaise
unless we bust a massive monster mamma-jam.
[KG] dude, we′ve been through so much shit,
[JB] deactivated lasers with my dick
[BOTH] now its time to blow this fucker down!
[JB] C′mon Kage now it′s time to blow doors down
[KG] I hear you Jables now it′s time to blow doors down
[JB] Light up the stage cause its time for a showdown
[KG] We′ll bend you over then we′ll take you to brown town
[BOTH] Now we′ve got to blow this fucker down
[KG] He′s gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down
[JB] C′mon Kage cause it′s time to blow doors down
[KG] Oh we′ll piledrive ya, it′s time for the smackdown
[JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss,
we know your weakness our rocket-sauce
we rock the casbah, and blow your mind
we will defeat you, for all mankind
you hold the scepter,
we hold the key
you are the devil,
we are the D [18x]

[Beelz]
You guys are fuckin′ lame. Come on Kage, You′re coming with me.
Taste my lightning fuckers!

[Tenacious D:]
[JB] NO!

[Beelz]
ow! Fuck!
My fuckin′ horn!
oh no!

[JB] From whence you came you shall remain,
until you are complete again

[Beelz]
No! Fuck you Kage and Fuck you Jables!
I′ll get you Tenacious D!

@ Tenacious D

Текст песни:

I′m the only gay eskimo
I′m the only one I know
I′m the only gay eskimo
In my tribe

I go out seal hunting with my best friend Tarka
But all I wanna do is get into his parka
I′m the only gay eskimo
In my tribe

Well .. me an nut fluck chuck buck, we both like blubber
But me I′ve got this crazy fetish for rubber
I′m the only gay eskimo
In my tribe

I make a wish on the northern lights
That I could get a decent pair of whale skin tights
I′m the only gay eskimo
In my tribe

And the seals they sing now
*seal noises*

These cold winter nights are taking their toll
I even get excited when I see the north pole
See the north pole

I′m the only gay eskimo
I′m the only one I know
I′m the only gay eskimo
In my tribe

@ Tenacious D